Astrotit

Astrotit – An absurd shoot ’em up from another galaxy (and era).

Astrotit is without a doubt one of the most bizarre and boundary-pushing shoot ’em ups of the 1980s. Released in 1987, it blends classic arcade action with a concept so goofy you’d think it was a parody — and it just might be.

Your mission is to blast your way through a surreal army of enemies, including:

  • 💊 Bouncing Birth-Control Pills
  • 📖 Flying Bibles (straight out of Dixieland)
  • 🦠 AIDS viruses

Yes, you read that right.

The gameplay is a classic vertical-scrolling shooter where you pilot a spaceship, dodge waves of enemies, collect power-ups, and try to survive as long as possible. Controls are simple, the graphics are authentic 8-bit retro, and the audio is all beeps and bloops that take you straight back to the arcade.

But it’s the concept and its enemies that make 1 something entirely different. It’s crude, silly, and almost certainly inappropriate today — which is exactly why it’s a bit of a cult classic among those who collect weird and bizarre DOS games.

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Martin Jørgensen

I create software content and Windows guides for Holyfile.com, focusing on up-to-date recommendations and clear, practical explanations. My goal is to help people choose the right software quickly and safely.

Reviewer’s rating with pros and cons, and user ratings

★★★★★

Astrotit is neither deep, pretty, nor technically impressive – but it is bonkers, over-the-top, and funny. A curiosity from a time when almost anything could be released as a game.


Pros:

✅ Classic arcade shooter gameplay
✅ Extremely distinctive and absurd humor
✅ Easy to play and quick to die
✅ Retro charm for those with a taste for the offbeat

Cons:

⚠️ Inappropriate and controversial content
⚠️ Repetitive gameplay and shallow depth
⚠️ No progression or storytelling
⚠️ Graphics and audio very limited – even for 1987

User Rating

★★★★★